Attitudes, Anger, and Appetite

I already knew that I was an emotional eater. I eat when I am sad, lonely, bored, and especially when I am happy. If I had a dime for every piece of food that I have put into my mouth because of some emotion that I had, I probably wouldn't care about the predicament that I currently find myself in. However, I am not rich and the bank is attempting to steal $25 of my money.

At first it was $50. I talked to the CSR on the phone and she told me she couldn't do anything for me and that I was going to have to talk to the branch manager. He was nice enough to tell me that I he would reverse one charge, "Against his better judgement?," but that he could not possibly reverse the other one. I worked in customer service practically my whole life, I KNOW that these charges can be reversed. They were NSF fees. They have no reasonable expectations to that money. They didn't know they were going to make $50 from me in a 24 hour period. All they knew is that they are jerks.

So I flat told him that he was a liar. He could possibly return that fee and that I needed to now talk to his manager. He transferred me to his manager who also told me that she couldn't reverse the fee either. After much arguing (and the tutoring center can attest that I was very convincing and surprisingly calm all things considered) she finally said, "Ma'am, you're right. I CAN return the fee, however, I am not going to." :O

I still did NOT lose my temper. I asked to talk to her manager. She gives me the number of the VP of operations for my bank, Edwards Federal Credit Union in case you were wondering, and I have left him a message, but like all good jerks, he didn't call me back before the close of business. I do not anticipate a phone call. I have given up hope that they will do the right thing and return my $25 that I still feel that they stole.

So what did I do? At first I was good. I counted calories. I ate what I was supposed to and I was good, but I was angry!! Being angry made me feel as though I had been left to fend myself for the last nine days. Unbeknownst to me, anger is another emotion that sends me to the fridge.

So here it is 10:44 pm and I pretty much took my day out in the three drinks I've had tonight (cranberry and malibu), nacho's, chips and guac, salsa, cheese, and Erin's delicious cream cheese dip. I didn't count. I actually won't be counting. I don't really know what I am going to do with today's events. Probably put a sad face in the book I log my food. Probably just pretend that it didn't happen. I haven't decided, but I know that whatever I do has to be coupled with a trip to the gym.

I feel like if I hadn't wussed out on the gym I wouldn't have needed to eat. I would have been pissed, gone to the gym, and worked out all my anger and instead I succumbed to the anger. I know that this whole thing is about attitudes. I need to find a better way to think about things. If it wasn't such a bad time to be out $25, I probably wouldn't have been so distraught, so now I've just realized that I need to change my attitude. I hope that ONE DAY I will be able to change it enough that my appetite will no longer be connected to each other.